Have a laugh, what the hell.
MARIANA: Don’t really know how to explain it simpler. You go in bathroom, throw up, flush toilet, come back out and resume training regime. Is not rocket science, Amelia.
SHAWN: There is no way in fuck I’m gonna be able to fit through that door.
DANIELA: This woman feeling me remind me of when I go to medic, and he find lump in my breast. Then later, he find out it is my breast.
SIMONA: That’s not judge committee chairwoman – it’s Silivas mother.
ANDREEA: Better practice for when I win gold medal at Sydney, unless I do something stupid to screw it up.
ELENA: All I know is somebody about to get her ass kick.
HENRIETTA: Dear Betty Okino. Please wipe off before you get on beam so I don’t slip. Love, Henrietta.
SIMONA: So what if he said you look like a kangaroo.
MARIA: I know. There was no lights on, so it’s not like he could see anything.
STELIANA: I don’t do it with my left hand – that’s how, Sandra! Stupid.
BOYFRIEND: Dear Tatiana, I sorry about the baby. Here is some money. Hope it help you.
NATALIA: But if you don’t sign up, you can’t win the washing machine!
VIKTORIA: Coach Ostapenko say, “Ho, ho ho!” but is stupid cause he got two big black eyebrow. Look like a leap frog!
COACH: Look, I’m not gonna get mad. I just need to know which one of you swallow the insulin.
GINA: Help – the clouds of immortal doom oppress me!
SABINA: Everybody else have to do podium training. I get to go to store and buy one bread and twelve potato. And one box tampons, whatever that is.
AMANDA: Okay – aside from that, what does Shannon have that I don’t have.
DANIELA: Is coaches looking?
CRISTINA: No, they all busy.
DANIELA: Okay, I’ll go first.
CRISTINA: Just aim good, cause last time you get it all over the table.
DANIELA: I can’t put them down – they’re stuck in my hair!
ALICIA: What you gonna do, brother, when Hulkamania runs wild on you!
NASTIA: Alicia, shut the hell up. You’re such an idiot!
VIKTORIA: You write “186,” not “Kick Me” like last time!
FORMINTE: No, I think you just got one of them butts that can’t keep nothing out of it. So to speaking. You probably grow into it someday.
MIRELA: They got a candy machine down that hall over there. GINA: I know. You bring the hammer?
OANA: Sure hope they don’t go back to hotel without me.
LILIA: (Whispering.) Have coach drive you over later. Me and Elena, we swipe bottle of wine from liquor store and rent lez movie from video store.
SHANNON: (Whispering back.) I can’t drink alcohol. I’m still on MAO inhibitors. What’s the movie about?
DINA: Oksana, shut up! They gonna feed us as soon as we go back home.
DANIELA: Right, like Nastia gonna come here in limo when all we get is a smelly taxi.
OLGA: So you say I don’t get pregnant from coach sperm? What about diarrhea from too much peaches?
I REMOVED THE PHOTO OF LITTLE KIM GWANG SUK because I got a note from the person who took the photo that said please remove it. So I did, because I’m a nice girl. But the caption is so funny, so I’ll just tell you the photo was of Kim when she was very young with a man who I assumed to be her coach. Here’s the caption:
COACH: Now that Kim is nine – I mean seventeen, we expcting great things from her!
ELFI: Why do you always show up for these things dressed like a man?
BELA: Jugs, you know . . . jugs! Va-voom! Kimbo, pay attention – I try to teaching you something here!
FORMINTE: The bad news is, I think I might have Carpal Tunnel Syndrome.
NADIA: This prick’s getting on my last nerve.
AURELIA to DANIELA: I don’t think you look nothing like Mukhina. She don’t use her arms, so she can’t even crawl. Plus she got normal hair.
KERRI: “You got an ant bite on it. I broke my whole damn ankle, so don’t fucking start.”
SHANNON: And please don’t let my mom find out I discovered yet another hole in my body, which makes seven, if you count both nostrils. Amen.
NADIA: “No, she not the prettiest doll in whole wide world, but she better than getting hit in the head with trash can lids.”
MORGAN: All I wanted for Christmas was my two front teeth, but things kind of got out of hand. This morning I fell at home and took a chunk out of the computer desk.
MILO: That’s nothing – you shoulda saw it after they get it unstuck out of Aurelia!
STELIANA: Hang on – somebody calling to tell me about another wedgie shoot on my butt that Sarah write a story about.
BELU: So now I suppose you want me to tell FIG to take artistic elements off the beam till you get comfortable with them.
GINA: And this one here is from when they X-ray my brain. Look like some chalk dust get transplanted through skull.
DANIELA: Um . . . it’s not chicken, and I’m pretty sure it’s not any kind of vegetable . . . Okay, I give up. What is it?
AMY: Guess I should have waited till after to show him my lingerie.
ANDREEA: I got gold medal, and my cold just about gone. Thank God all my troubles over!
EKATERINA: Is not lice! Ouch! Is from when Yelena and Sveta spill wheat germ on it.
NATALIA: No way! With my luck, they try to deport me.
BELU: Okay, you go deal with Oana, I go find somebody ass to kick, starting with Catalina. Should have taken up mechanical drawing like Papa told me.
NASTIA: If you don’t find my phone, I won’t be able to see if I got any new friends on Twitter. If I don’t know if I got any new friends, I won’t be able to focus. If I can’t focus, I can’t do beam. If I can’t do beam, I can’t win the gold medal. If I don’t win gold, I’m going to make your life a living fucking nightmare. So do you see why it’s important that you find my phone?
KID: Is it hard to get on the Olympic volleyball team?
NADIA: Hey, Mohini – great job! I hope I can do that good when I’m your age!
NASTIA: Bitch! SHAWN: Nastia!
ELISE: (Thinking.) God, it’s a miracle I made this team. KRISTEN: (Thinking.) Who’s that girl on the floor? She’s got on a leo just like ours. AMY: (Thinking.) Medications used to shrink fibroids are usually given IM in a large muscle. Medications used to shrink fibroids are usually given IM in a large muscle. Medications used to . . . TASHA: (Thinking.) It’s a miracle Elise made this team. DOMINIQUE: (Thinking.) It’s a miracle I don’t go over there and pop Elise in the jaw.
SVETLANA: Yeah, but this one is REAL silver. Yours is gold-plated and gonna tarnish, probably before you find some guy drunk enough to fuck you.
Go here for Page 2 of Funny Photos!